David Farber's hobby (in the xkcd sense): twisting common phrases. My favorite Farberisms:

  • A hand in the bush is worth two anywhere else.
  • Don't just stand there like a sitting duck.
  • He's cornered on all sides.
  • I could count it on the fingers of one thumb.
  • I haven't gotten the knack down yet.
  • I read the sign, but it went in one ear and out the other.
  • It's burned to shreds.
  • It's more than the mind can boggle.
  • It's the old Paul Revere bit ... one if by two and two if by one.
  • Just remember that, and then forget it.
  • Let's shoot holes at it.
  • My mind is a vacuum of information.
  • No loaf is better than half a loaf at all.
  • You're blowing it all out of context.

These almost make the original clichés and idioms sound ridiculous, don't they?

3 Responses to “Farberisms”

  1. monk.e.boy Says:

    This is called mixing your metaphors. Take two metaphors (not enough room to swing a cat & there’s enough space to turn a battle ship) mix: not enough room to swing a battle ship. Which, now wrong, sounds correct and therefore is humorous.

    google: impermissible mixed metaphors

    They remind me of my dad and his work colleagues gentle humor.


  2. BlueMM Says:

    I personally like/use all the time:
    * Let’s make like a tree & get the f*ck out of here (Wayne’s World I believe)
    * Does the Pope sh*t in the woods?

    PS. Did you get a chance to read my email on your Bookmarklets import file updates?

  3. Westacular Says:

    In the same vein as these Farberisms:

    Don’t eat with your mouth full
    Don’t talk with you mouth open

    Both of which I’ve heard used, unintentionally, multiple times.